Bad Dates by Zdenko Tarasovič

28/04/2011 10:19


People tend to say that the worst thing to happen when you ask someone out is hearing the answer “No”. Believe me, it can be worse. There are hundreds of possible ways how to tell you they are definitely not interested in going out with you and still use only one word. Body language, more importantly facial expressions, and intonation necessarily reveal the true opinion they have about you and your proposal. Moreover, if the answer is accompanied with malicious laughter, you will get a bonus – shredded self-confidence. But even the answer “Yes” should not be celebrated (that much) because it is only the beginning of many scenarios that might end badly.

First of all, the infamous “being stood up” phenomenon remains the most embarrassing cause of a thwarted date. Not only are you alone at the table for two being forced to look at that smirk on a waiter’s face, but you have also no idea why the other side chose not to show up. Whether it is supposed to be a silly joke or your potential love had a serious accident and is probably dead by that time. In any case, try to avoid emotional breakdown. There is always a chance that some other couples in a restaurant are enjoying themselves and you do not want to ruin their evening as well. Thus, although your partner has not arrived, do not let shame prevail over your dignity in this most awkward situation.

Secondly, living in exaggerated expectations is another way to spoil your own upcoming date. This second scenario does not start as a tragedy at all. On the contrary, it starts quite well. Your partner does show up and everything seems fine. However, as the evening wears on, one of you two suddenly realizes, for instance, the other one is hopelessly boring, does not know how to behave properly, or a spark you felt before is gone. In fact, you fell in love at first sight with an illusion or just a dream, again. Hence being conscious of human flaws and imperfection softens the negative impact of unfulfilled anticipation on you during and after an unsuccessful date.

Last but not least, something that people call “the series of unfortunate events” keeps them from having an amazing rendezvous from the start. Staining your lucky shirt with toothpaste, which usually makes you look rather slovenly, does not help your aplomb. Similarly, missing your bus and therefore running flat-out, which normally equals getting sweaty, does not boost your image in any positive way. Forgetting your cinema tickets or a debit card, which certainly means not being a perfect gentleman, is my favourite. Likewise, it destroys the first impression you have hoped for. Altogether, intensive preparation must be considered crucial if you do not long for some ridiculous coincidence to frustrate the first moments on your impeccable date.

 In conclusion, I believe it is clear that having a date is not only fun as some people claim. Actually, it is a constant fight. To be more specific, it is a fight with yourself. Either you must overcome a failure, not expect dreams come true on the very first date, or not let some trivialities ruin your self-confidence. But on the other hand, even bad dates should be enjoyed. As they say, every experience counts. Who knows, maybe describing such a date humorously at a party would beguile someone interesting. My advice is very simple. Keep trying. After every ten bad dates, there is one successful waiting for you.